I miss Hawaii

So this semester at BYU has been the hardest yet, and I know that its because I did only generals and its just FREEEZING cold and I hate climbing up the stairs now that I'm south of campus. So of course I see my friends graduating BYUH on facebook and I know that if I would have stayed there I would have been done with school. But if I would have known what I know now I still would have transferred here to BYU because I have had so many amazing memories here. But one thing I will never regret is spending two beautiful years in Hawaii. I am so lucky to have gotten to go there and also attend BYU. I miss Hawaii every day so here's my shout out via Jack Johnson. Mele Kalikimaka!

Yes, this is exactly what I am doing.

So, yes, if you were wondering, I am posting on my blog when I should be studying. I don't know what it is but finals week it is 4 times as hard to study for. Maybe because my classes are so close to being over that I just pretend in my head that they are? Its not good. I end up gaining back the 5 pounds I worked by butt off to lose in like 3 days.. Oreos, chips, ranch dip, ice cream, etc. I should have never taken Psychology so I never had to learn that stress eating is a real thing and comfort food actually works and makes you feel better. I wish carrots made me feel better. here's a video that makes me feel a lot better. excuse the language, but this video makes me smile.

Anyways, so food is a distraction. Also of course Youtube, Netflix, Hulu, iTunes, Hellogiggles, websites that make rain noises, random strangers blogs, or anything else that isn't learningsuite, studyblue, word, email, and word documents.  I have so many tabs open that my computer is kind of freaking out. My hometeachers came over and said the theme of this semesters finals are "don't worry, be happy."  but I'm afraid that I am going to take that theme too literally and actually not worry, and be "happy" and then get my grades back and cry. So that better not happen.

Also with the amount of stupid that I've dealt with this semester I feel like I have a get out of jail free card??? Yes?? Anyone?  sure.. so thats how I feel right now. Also my D&C class makes me want to give up on humanity, because of how impossible my professor is so as long as I still love the human race I think I'll be ok if I don't do so well on my finals. Anyways. Maybe I should study now? I have a final in 3 hours, and another one in 5 hours.. sooooo yup. I guess I'll get back to studying. maybe..

Here's my theme song for the semester. Love this song. Love the Hunger games soundtrack. Love Sia.

Misogyny: As Relevant Today as in Greek and Roman Mythology

The subject of sexual politics of Greek and Roman mythology is very degrading to the feelings, rights, and respect of women in today’s world. The myths describe women as being monsters, hated, cursed, deceiving, sexual, and claim to desire to be treated this way. This seems inconceivable for them to believe this way yet we believe and celebrate this same misogyny in today’s world.

In the Odyssey, by Homer, almost all of the monsters were women and blamed as the cause of most of Odysseus’ hardships. Calypso was categorized as a sexual, persuasive, nymph who keeps Odysseus on her island for 8 years. The Sirens and Scylla were ruthless monsters who’s goal was to kill Odysseus and his men whether it was by biting off their heads or a sensual song they sang to lead them into their trap. Helen was essentially the cause of the war and was stolen away yet she seemed pretty calm and collect about it all. There is no mention of it being wrong for the women to act this way.

 Other myths include Pandora’s Box and the Myth of Europa which both show this Misogyny. Pandora is blamed and is the original cause for all man kind to experience the disease and sickness and bad things in life. Europa is celebrated on the Euro coin when she was stolen by a bull. The beautiful and some would say “worshiped” statue of Bernini’s “Rape of Persephone” has Zeus and Persephone intertwined and spiraled upwards. Why do we celebrate these stories and works of art when the subject matter is so horrid? Maybe we as humans love a story with a “good vs. evil” theme?

Stories older than Disney have always portrayed the “damsel in distress” who is stolen and tied up and thrown on a railroad track. She then, of course, is rescued by her hero soon after. But, who didn’t love the excitement of the anticipating train coming closer and closer? If things like this would happen in real life everyone involved might suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder for years afterwards, and may not even be able to speak of the experience, instead of brining it up in small talk. Yet, somehow we don’t even notice that this kind of thing is still all over the movie screen, our radios, and other forms of entertainment.

“Twilight” for example describes a girl who falls in love with a boy who not only can kill her because he is a vampire, but the fact that he is so strong he can bruise her from holding her too tight. “Twilight” is one of the biggest things that has hit this world and has gotten a hold of every 40-year-old “Team Edward” mothers who seriously need a life. Or for example, the song “Love the Way You Lie” by Rihanna and Eminem, that lyrics describe a conversation of a man who has beat his significant other and promises to not do it again. Yet what does Rihanna think about this? The same Rihanna who was actually beaten Chris Brown. She says that she “loves the way he lies.” This song is played more on the radio more than a Jason Mraz song. And lastly I’d like to bring up that recently I have found it significantly disturbing that during Halloween you can actually pay an extra fee at a haunted house to have the actors not just scare you, but touch you and carry you away from all your friends in a fabricated horror story environment.

This is because gender roles today are still a little bit skewed. Woman in magazines, television, and movies are portrayed as scandalous, over-emotional, rude, jealous, loud, and what they call “independent.” They claim that if a woman is all of these things it breaks her away from the stigma of being a silent housewife controlled by man. Aren’t these similar attributes that perhaps the Greek God Hera has? Zeus cheated on her more than any mythological story. Was Zeus blamed for his actions? No. He is still considered the God of all Greek Gods.  We still see this today that when a woman is raped we still tend to blame the women on either being too flirty, too vulnerable, having too many drinks, or even blaming her for putting herself in the environment in the first place.

What is our solution to this? How can we stop this misogyny towards woman when it has been around since the Greeks and Romans? D. Todd Christopherson says, ““The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity.” If women respect themselves enough and hold themselves to a higher standard we can break this Misogyny.

Unfortunately life isn’t as romantic as a Jane Austin book, is not as thrilling as an Alfred Hitchcock film, and is not as epic as a Marvel series. Because of this we must not celebrate real rape victims by acting them out in haunted houses. If women adapt this as apart of their entertainment and become as “independent” as the media describes us to be then we become the mythological monsters like Scylla, Calypso, Hera, the Furies, and the Sirens who were the start of this misogyny in Greek and Roman mythology.

Artists I Did Not Appreciate Until College

This is too long to blog about so I decided to make it a segment thing... So for today I decided to dedicate this to Jack Johnson. First of all, I not only didn't appreciate his pure raw talent until college, but not until I lived in Hawaii for two years for college. MAN HE IS JUST SYRUP AND HONEY... Dang.. that's all I can say about Jack Johnson. I could listen to him all day. In High School I think I pretty much tuned him out except for "Banana Pancakes" which honestly creeped me out sometimes when he would say "mamma made a baby.." What the... Thats all I had to think about Jack Johnson. Then I lived in Hawaii where literally all day I just want to not go to class because "baby, its raining, and we're in hawaii... and I want me some BANANA PANCAKES. And I would home that the super hot surfur guys walking around campus had eye's in the back of their head so that they could tell me that I looked good as I walked away. Holidays became way more meaningful especially when I couldn't come home for thanksgiving and realized that we're just "better when we're together" and not over Skype. I would just wander around, and pretend that I'm somewhere else, about 2,000 miles from here. And somedays I would feel just like a tough enchilada filled up with nada. But at the end of the day, Bubbly Toes is the song that describes life in Hawaii the best. The song always makes me think of cute sweet Minami who was my landlord's granddaughter who was the most beautiful half polynesian half white 9 year old bunch of adorableness who I believe this song was written for. Here's the lyrics because I can't leave anything out. Makes me think of barefoot walks to Bristles Beach, Drift wood forts, Snorkling at Shark's Cove, listening and singing to this song in an old car with no air conditioning, playing cards, jumping on Rachel and Eevannah's bed. Boy I miss them. These are my lovely roommates who are both on missions. Best girls ever.

It's as simple as something that nobody knows
That her eyes are as big as her bubbly toes
On the feet of a queen of the hearts of the cards
And her feet are all covered with tar balls and scars

It's as common as something that nobody knows
That her beauty will follow wherever she goes
Up the hill in the back of her house in the wood
She'll love me forever, I know she could

I remember when you and me mmm
How we used to be just good friends
Wouldn't give me none but all I wanted was some

She's got a whole lot of reasons
She can't think of a single one that can justify leaving
And he got none but he thinks he got so many problems
Man he got, too much time to waste

His dreams are like commercials
But her dreams are picture perfect and
Our dreams are so related though they're often underestimated

It's as simple as something that nobody knows that
Her eyes are as big as her bubbly toes
On the feet of the queen of the hearts of the cards
And her feet are infested with tar balls and

La da da da da da
La da da da da da da
La da da da da da
La da da da da da da da

Well I was eating lunch at the D.L.G.
When this little girl came and she sat next to me
I never seen nobody move the way she did
Well she did and she does and she'll do it again

When you move like a jellyfish rhythm don't mean nothing
You go with the flow, you don't stop
Move like a jellyfish rhythm is nothing
You go with the flow, you don't stop

It's as common as something that nobody knows it
Her beauty will follow wherever she goes
Up the hill in the back of her house in the wood
She'll love me forever, I know she

La da da da da da
La da da da da da da
La da da da da da
La da da da da da da da

If you would only listen, you might just realize
What you're missing, you're missing me
If you would only listen, you might just realize
What you're missing, you're missing me

It's as simple as something that nobody knows that
Her eyes are as big as her bubbly toes
On the feet of the queen of the hearts of the cards
And her feet are infested with tar balls and

La da da da da da
La da da da da da da
La da da da da da
La da da da da da da

La da da da da da
La da da da da da da
La da da da da da
La da da da da da da da

Read more: Jack Johnson - Bubble Toes Lyrics | MetroLyrics 


Here's the one and only picture I have of Minami when we went to Taco Bell. (Stolen from Rachel's FB) and some other pics :)

Hipster Musical Moments

So sometimes (as in pretty rarely), I stumble upon some musical genius's that no one has ever heard of yet. 1. it makes me feel super cool 2. I feel like I am the only one in the world who gets to enjoy their talent 3. I feel the need to share them to everyone I know like a Missionary shares the gospel. I found most of them from a suggested playlist on hellogiggles. I can't get enough of that website. But others I just stumbled upon. So here's a list of the greatest songs ever, give them a chance, they will soon be stuck in your head or make you be in aw of their beauty:

*I'm appologize if you are cool enough to already know some of these songs. I applaud your musical taste.

1. Fare Thee Well- Oscar Isaac & Marcus Mumford (Yes like Mumford and Sons)
2. Let Me Down Easy- Sheppard (be prepared to have this stuck in your head all day.)
3. All of the People- Panama Wedding
4. All I Want is You- Ball Park Music
5. Wild Love- Gossling
6. Is This How You Feel- The Preatures
7. Somebody Loves You- Betty Who
8. Beggin' -Madcon
9. Tennis Court- Lorde (I'm sure everyone has heard this one by now)
10. Home- Dan Croll

Yes, I am going to be listening to these 10 songs on a shuffled repeated playlist for the rest of the month :D

My Friends=Friends?

So, about a month ago I think it was my friend Devon who brought it up but he mentioned how that our group of friends has become like Friends the TV show. Haha, we have all at one point been interested in each other, dating each other, been extremely mad at each other, not speaking to each other, living with each other--I would say its only been boys with boys and girls with girls except I kind of count Devon living with me for a couple days meaning his stuff was in my fridge because his was broken during homeless week at BYU.--, anyways. So now I come to the question... WHYYY??? we have been friends with each other for over a year now. And it has literally felt like we have been friends all of my years of college. Some people have come into our group, some have got married, and some of us have been in and out of serious relationships but still we stay super good friends. Weird. Anyways. So I have decided that I love my friends so much.. like a lot. I never thought that I would be so close to girls like Stephanie, Nichole, and Asthen. They are my everything. I have gotten even closer to Nichole and Ashten since I started living with them at Liberty Square. Love them so much. This month has been pretty rough for me but I come home from school to Nichole making me cry laughing at her staring at me with her creepy smile in her face mask while dancing to her strobe light. And then I die laughing at Ashten when she comes out of no where and says the perfect combination of witty and inappropriate that it makes me so happy inside. And Nathan Eagan who is our Liberty Square neighbor now. Can't express how wonderful it is to still have him close. He is my anchor in life. I have known Nathan from the beginning with Devon and Braden at the Riv. He has been there for me through thick and thin and is there to slow dance with me "ballroom style" at every dance we try and crash. Always up for a party and for fun even if he is crazy busy. If its important to him, he will be there. With a homemade casserole and a singing voice of an angel. And there's the boys of Manavu of course. Sometimes I literally want to punch them all individually in the face. But sometimes they are just the best. We'll start with Kyle. Sweet Kyle. All of the inappropriate things he says is usually made up for all of the times he calls me babe, baby, sweetheart, and honey. It use to annoy me, but I really do love it. It makes me feel important. And then there's Braden. Not only does he share my little brothers name but I seriously respect this dude. 60% of the time Im convinced he came from outer space, but his snapchats are always my favorite. This guy oozes with witty remarks and crowd pleasing jokes. He's too mainstream for stand up comedy. Then there's Devon. Devon is probably the one I argue the most with to his face. I guess I can just be real with him cause I know he doesn't judge. But he is pretty dang awesome. However, I do not agree with 1. His picky taste in women, 2. His views about eating canadian candy with .000000001 amount of coffee in it. 3. His over the top strict views about curfew and 4. His women jokes. But on the other hand I do agree with his 1. work ethic 2. Money management skills/frugalness and 3. loyalty. 4. Active/up for anything fun. If you need him to help you with something he will be there. And if he can't be there he will find someone to be there for you. For real though. He is the best. And last and sometimes least of all there is William. I'm joking about the least because we joke that everyone kind of hates William. Its not that any of us actually do. We just can't handle all of him at once at times. He is seriously one of a kind though. All I can think of to describe william is to put Mr. Darcy, Nick (from New Girl), Squidward, the Grinch, Steve Carell into a blender...especially Steve Carell's eyebrows.. and you have William. But I will say that that wouldn't even begin to describe him. Also you have to add his amazing dance moves or else you don't know Will at all. He is the reason I go to some dances. And after meeting his brother I now know it runs in the family. Will is so great though. You know when you've gone through so many ups and downs with someone that in the end you just feel like you have to be friends forever now? Thats how I feel about all of these guys. Seriously, they are all golden. There wives are going to be absolute rockstars..and no I will NOT be a groomsman at their wedding like some weird girls do when their super close guy friends get married.. Its weird...and I will not be apart of that cult. The wedding is for the girl.. if we are friends and wants me to be a bridesmade thats fine..but if not I'll sit quietly in the back sipping my italian soda and eating all of the cake balls...all of them. Anyways. I love these guys so much. Which is why I let them eat my free meal at the awful waffle every time I work 1. because I am on a diet 2. because my roommates are on a diet and 3. Because I seriously love them and can't make up for everything they do for me. Priesthood blessing, home teachers, study buddies, moving buddies, farmers market company, choir concert 'dates', wingmen, chauffeurs, crazy dance buddies, student section groups at football games, and way more that I can't think of right now. They could make an extremely funny TV show of our crazy life we've spent together over a year I've known all these fools. If they ever read this I will die. Because as far as they know, I only hang out with them to make me feel cool. It boosts their ego a little bit I think. But don't worry. I yell at them enough to bring it back down. I guess all of this Halloween decorating has gotten me in the holiday mood. A thankful, happy, peaceful, joyful, spirited mood. Hope it never goes away. Yay for friends who remind me of Friends. Never a bad thing.

Disclaimer: These are not all of my super close friends. These are just my friends who have recently made my life a little bit brighter. I literally started making a list of the people I love with all my heart and I couldn't stop naming names. Thats what happens when you grow up in California, go to school at BYU Hawaii, Work at Disney World, Go to BYU, and go on a Study Abroad to Europe. You meet people that change your life. More to come probably since I'm in such a people are awesome mood.

here's something that made me laugh out loud and almost pee my pants today. Gotta love Ellen:

America Is Closed

First of all I was suppose to post about this yesterday, sorry. Sorry to all of the billions of people following my blog..as in no one. I don't mind that no one reads my blog, mostly because I like writing to no one. It gets rid of the pressure. Anyways, so the government was shut down yesterday which is kind of crazy right? I didn't really know what to think about until I went to my Financial Management class later that day. Let me just say that my Financial Management class is the most wonderful class in the world.

Reason #1: Every class feels like a motivational speech given by the smartest man in AMERICA. Mostly because he's pretty funny and good what he does and is extremely knowledgable. If he was telling me straight up lies I might not know because I just trust most of what he says because he is so smart. But I do actually agree with a lot of his "normal to understand" logic.

Reason #2: I am not the best at managing my money but I would say I am a pretty frugal spender so all the notes I take in this class are like a revelation. So precious to me I keep it in my most favorite Taylor Swift notebook. Sometimes I feel like a joke in that class. I walk in to the JKB where there are about a billion super attractive men in suits who are too busy for women, and I walk in there with my floral pink Vera Bradley backpack, my mickey mouse sweater and my floral sneakers and sit down and pull out my one of 5 taylor swift notebooks I got from Big Lots and take notes about being serious in life. But then I remember the quote from New Girl of course:
"I brake for birds. I rock a lot of polka dots. I have touched glitter in the last 24 hours. I spend my entire day talking to children... but that doesn’t mean I’m not smart and tough and strong."
Sometimes I hope that this quote is correct and that I really am smart and tough and strong. I may have worked at Disney World and I might like cats more than a normal person but I also consider myself a tomboy in a way. I like baseball and I'd much rather go camping then stay at a hotel. I guess that's just me though. Who's to say that I can't listen to some Jack's Mannequin and Yellowcard as loud as I can in the car and rock out but also scream like a little girl when my favorite One Direction song comes on at a dance party? I think that Jaime can definitely like both things. That's what I think though.

Reason #3: I love all the references he makes to the Gospel. As much information I get about how to be financially smart I get equal amounts of how to be spiritually smart and knowledgable in the Gospel. I love it. It's great.

So back to my original plan for this post: America is closed.. My friend who I worked with at Disney posted on Facebook a pretty funny status that said "Happy 42nd anniversary to Magic Kingdom in Disney World! In other news, America is closed." I thought that was pretty funny. Im not sure if saying America is closed is actually correct but it is pretty funny. Anyways, so in my financial management class we first went over 14 challenging trends of America over the years. Then after that depressing lesson we then spent the rest of the class going over 22 compelling trends of America. It was awesome. We talk about in class a lot that attitude really is everything and it truly can make you more successful and live longer. I think I was blessed to have been born with a very optimistic family and way of thinking for myself. Its just the way I am. So I always love hearing that there are more positive things happening in America especially after hearing about the Government closing yesterday. Here's some of my favorite quotes from the class period that I took. Some are from books and some of from my teacher.. sorry If I don't label them. I write so fast in that class:

"within a generation, we will be able to provide goods and services,once reserved for the wealthy few, to any and all who need them" -Abundance: The future is better than you think

Howard W. Hunter lived through the Great Depression, 2 World Wars, and Vietnam. If he had hope then so can we.

The Air Force Rule of Three
You can't survive...
3 months without companionship or love
3 weeks without food
3 days without water
3 hours without shelter (in dangerous conditions)
3 minutes without air
3 seconds without spirit and hope

Luke 17:32 "Remember Lot's wife."

"If you have a reason to believe, then this is the age of miracles!" -Brother Marsh


Also here's some pretty funny memes I've seen in the past 24 hours. Your welcome:

Where Words Fail, Music Speaks

As I go through my old journals, I notice that I put a heck of a lot of songs lyrics in them. At first I was frustrated because I was like, "dude, why can't I come up with anything myself. Why do I need someone else's song to describe how I'm feeling." But then I thought about it and yeah, maybe I do not have the skill of writing my own songs. I am musical and maybe if I really took the time and effort I could come up with something but there is nothing I love more than when I hear a song on the radio and the words feel like they are talking right to me. I am an artist. I am not so good with words, grammar, spelling, or even thinking. But I do know that I am very good at expressing how I feel in my art, in my decoration, in my organization, in my clothes, and in my way of living. Nothing in the world is original. We take what we learn and come up with ways to express ourselves from things around us. I like to take songs I hear and put them in my journal because that is the only way I can communicate how I feel about anything. I am not much of a feelings person, but I am a musical person. As wonderful Mr. Mac had posted in his choir room, "Where Words Fail, Music Speaks." And I have lived by that since I heard it. Here's a music video that is equally visually and musically artistic and beautiful. Love Regina. She's the best.

FRESH START FIRDAY IS HERE!

Well, Fresh Start Friday didn't start the way I wanted it to, only because I woke up to the worst cramps ever instead of an alarm clock.. thank you womanhood. jerk. But then I went to class, took good notes, finished my Physical Science homework in the Lab and turned it in while also studying for my test Monday. Then I walked home in the freezing cold, made hot chocolate when I got home and now I'm getting ready for work. But what has really made this day amazing was this article I stumbled upon on my favorite website currently (hellogiggles) Anyways. It's called "12 Things That Make you Happy, You Shouldn't Apologize for, Ever." Just a list of the simple joys in life that can be appreciated on bad days like Mondays and little things in life that get you down. So great. Here's the list, I'm probably breaking some copywrit rules so heres the link just in case I get in trouble: http://hellogiggles.com/12-things-that-make-you-so-happy-you-shouldnt-apologize-ever

1.  Eating all the chips and salsa and then asking for more.

It’s perfectly okay to devour all the warm, salty tortilla chips they have perfected at your favorite Mexican restaurant. Even though you ordered a giant plate of awesome, it’s alright to say “yes” when your server asks if you would like more chips. You can’t get these anywhere else (at least not like this) and the crunch is just too satisfying. Order the chips.

2.  Sinking your face into a pile of warm, freshly washed clothes.

Nothing smells and feels as good as a bundle of warm, clean clothes after the weekly hassle of hunting down two empty washers and dryers, climbing up and down stairs with a basket full of clothing, and separating darks and whites is over. Go ahead and nestle up. Breathe in that soothing laundry detergent smell and be thankful you don’t have to do this again for another week.

3.  Buying a new notebook even though you haven’t used up your old one (or two, or ten)

I have at least twenty notebooks that are half-filled with notes, stories, essays, diary entries, or drawings, but it doesn’t feel quite right starting the semester off with a used notebook, or beginning a new year with a diary from last year’s thoughts. Getting a new notebook and writing on the first pristinely white and baby-blue lined page is just so good. This ties with finding the perfect pen that inspires you to write neatly because of its magical pen qualities (ballpoint, grip, quality ink).

4. Harry Potter marathons.

The ABC Family Harry Potter marathons are the best. Staying home in pajamas and not leaving the couch because you want to re-live the moment Harry saves Ginny from the Chamber of Secrets or all the times Hermione is extremely sassy and smarter than everyone is definitely one the best things you can do for yourself and your childhood memories. Long live Harry Potter!

5. Skyping with someone you haven’t seen in forever.

And accepting its initial awkwardness but then getting back into the groove of knowing this person and why you love them. Making sure you don’t have a double chin while you rant and rave about your crazy neighbor or listen to them tell you there are way too many trees where they live now. Not realizing it’s been over two hours since you dialed them up.

6. Buying shampoo solely based on its scent

Parabens? Non-organic? Sulfates? Who cares. If your shampoo smells like apples or vanilla-lavender, it’s totally worth it.

7. Finding a crazy recipe on Pinterest and managing to pull it off.

Like those soups that people make in vegetables, or brownies that taste like the ones from the box but are actually made with kale and avocados. Most of the time, I end up with brown pools of inedible garbage in my cake tins, but sometimes you just NAIL it and create something genius and delicious.

8. Managing to find a pair of jeans that fit in one shopping trip.

Alas, this feat is close to impossible. While you’re a 2 in one store, you might be an 8 in another. Boot-cut is weird, and why does everyone have those pre-ripped pants? Stop it already. But there’s this one day you’ll have, maybe once every other year, where you walk into a single store and you find jeans that hug you in all the right ways, the wash is a perfect blue, and they actually FIT your thighs, ass, and calves. HALLELUJAH, I say.

9. Deleting an ex from Facebook.

It’s just the internet, but clicking the “un-friend” button when you know you’ve been holding on for no reason whatsoever is so, so satisfying. They’ll never see pictures of you having the time of your life without them because they don’t deserve to.

10.  Showering when you haven’t in awhile

Days go by until you realize your hair desperately needs to be shampooed. And lathered. And rinsed. And your armpit hair is outrageous and you kind of smell like deodorant and old sheets. Um, I know I’ve been there. Try grading 75 essays in a single weekend and you will forget the word “shower”. Stepping inside the steaming hot tub and letting the water pour down your body is insanely amazing. The feeling of squeaky-clean in a pair of unworn PJs is just awesome.

11. Someone complimenting your outfit.

I’m not vain or anything, but if someone stops what they’re doing and informs me that my dress or hair or shoes are nice, I feel a billion times more confident about myself and sense of style. And no, you don’t need the affirmation to feel good about yourself. But it’s a pretty nice gesture, right?

12. That feeling you get when you know everything is going to be okay.

After a gruesome week at work, or crappy day at school, all the negativity clouds your vision and senses like bad perfume. You would be fine if you never had to leave your apartment again and you consider moving to a country that is thousands of miles away from everything that’s getting you down. But after awhile, you fall asleep. And you wake up. And you make a pot of coffee. And you step outside and the air is perfectly crisp. It is then that you understand that everything is going to be okay. It will always be okay.

So far I have actually done most of these in the past two weeks. Pretty impressive. And YES I did the jeans one. Went to Trendy Exchange for cheap joy shopping and tried on a pair of blue skinny jeans. First one I saw, tried it on, they fit, and only $10. I thought I had just broke a shopping record. Its those kinds of things that make me feel good. Not winning a football game, not even acing a test, but trying on a pair of perfect jeans, going to a farmers market with friends and sampling some of the best food I've ever tasted, clean laundry, fuzzy socks, full tank of gas, and melted cheese.

Fresh Start Fridays

So as apart of my goals of a new semester I feel like I am struggling. Only because I have like a bagillion goals I want to accomplish before the end of the year. So as I am trying to come up with a better way to stay on task I decided that I HATE MONDAYS... I hate mondays so much that I sometimes stop trying all day because I hate them so much. I always feel more tired because I tried to take a nap Sunday but ended up over sleeping causing me to go to bed way to late and then wake up for a 9 am class on Monday and have 4 more classes after that.. no thank you. And everything always goes wrong on Monday. I think every Monday this semester something has gone terribly wrong. First Monday, I tripped up the stairs on the way to school and made my first little crack in my phone. Second Monday I got locked out, I couldn't find anything to wear, and I don't remember now what else happened but I distantly remember that day was awful. Anyways, long story short, every Monday after that I have just given up. Sooo normally on sunday I would say all the things I wanted to do for that week and starting monday I would start to do them.. heck no. After giving up on the day itself there's no way I am going to have the desire to do anything on that list now. Fridays are now Fresh Start Fridays for me. I'm preparing for my first one by doing a little bit of grocery shopping at the farmers market, cleaning my room so that I can truly start over on friday. Then maybe Mondays won't be so bad after all. Just kidding, Mondays are awful, that will never happen. I have a new diet, all my winter stuff hung up, (because its starting to get freezing already...what the heck Provo), going to do laundry tomorrow, going to catch up on homework, going to re learn how to make hot chocolate at work tomorrow, and going to have a wonderful Fresh Start Friday. Then I will be prepared enough to relax on Saturday and Sunday and not have to stress about the week. Because Fridays will be MY day :D

And here is a wonderful quote from New Girl that expresses usually how my Mondays go.

Hello Giggles and Mona Lisa Smile

So I recently found this website called hellogiggles.com. Zooey Deschanel and two other women created it. Its amazing. Not only is it a website that swears off all negativity and destructive gossip; its actually an adorable website. They have everything from hair bow tutorials to cat videos to articles on why being called pretty isn't always a compliment to some girls. So cool. In the video on youtube discussing their creation Zooey says that she's a feminist who isn't a feminist. Which is silly to say yes I know but she explains that she believes in equality but she doesn't believe women or men should change their behavior. Be you! Just even the playing field a bit. When a girl does something amazing we shouldn't say, "wow, what a strong female. She is so awesome for a girl!" Sometimes I even think that myself. I know that sometimes we don't think that about every situation but it does still happen. One time I got invited to play basketball with some of my guy friends. Even though these were my close friends and I like playing basketball, at the moment I was really tired and simply not in the mood to play. We've all been there. Anyways, after I told them no and said that I was tired and not feeling basketball today, like good friends they kept asking me. Then something changed. They started saying that they would make it easy for me, or that it really isn't that hard to play, and things like, "we'll make it a girl friendly game." Thats when I got slightly offended. I knew they meant nothing by it and were only trying to get me to play. I said no again but went home pretty peeved. Why did they have to change the rules just for me to play? I have played sports with them many times and never had they said anything like that. Conclusion. There is still a slight hint of sexism out there. Obviously it can't be changed over night but a girl needs to be able to get up on stage and tell a joke and be called a comedian and not, "oh cool, a female comedian."

I recently watched the movie Mona Lisa Smile. WONDERFUL MOVIE! I highly recommend it. (its on Netflix right now ;D) This movie is set in the 1950s when all that was required of a woman was to get married and be a mother and a homemaker. What's wrong with that? Nothing at all if that is what you want. What is wrong is assuming that is what every woman should want and her path to get there should be exactly the same. At first the movie made me think "Yeah! I don't need a man! I can get a degree in whatever I want! I can get a job and support myself and do whatever I want!!! GO WOMEN!!" but then as the movie progressed I realized, that is what the movie is telling me I should want. It made the girl who got married in college look like the judging villain and the girl wanted to attend law school a hero. By the end of the movie it had changed. The only reason the first girl was more like a villain was because she was negative and judging and always put down others. It had nothing to do with her wanted to get married. And the second girl, while she wanted to attend Yale, she wanted to have a home and a family more. She was a hero because in the end she truly did what SHE wanted. And she shouldn't be judged for wanted to attend Yale, but aslo she shouldn't be judged for choosing a family over Law School. I like this idea of being a feminist but not a feminist. I don't have to change who I am. I can believe that for me and my life, I want a family. I want to be a mom. Most feminists would disagree. I believe that as women we shouldn't have to BE anything. We can be whoever we want, and get there however we like.

She & Him obsession.

So hopefully you watched this video before you started reading, but I just wanted to say how obsessed I am with this song, this album, this video, and Zooey in general. I also found this website recently called http://wwzdw.com/ which stands for What Would Zooey Deschanel Wear. Beautiful. I cannot wait for New girl to start up again. She has this classy, funny, beautiful humor that I simply adore. I can't get enough of her. I feel like I relate to her a lot being a second child myself. I mean it must hard growing up with a sister who is the serious detective in Bones. Not that I can relate to that. My sister is just about as serious as me as in we both have similar humor I think. But anyways, I feel like she has this awesome silly carefree confidence that I think I have too. Not that i'm no Zooey Deschanel, but my friend Chris did say that the first time he watched new girl all he could do was laugh because it was exactly how I was last summer when it was basically me hanging out with him, Nick and Travis, and the occasional Devon sometimes. Unfortunately we identified him as more of a Schmidt but honestly those boys are pretty hard to relate to actual people. I think my girly "New Girl" side came out after I worked at Disney for sure and especially after I roomed with Jen Allen from Disney. LOVE HER TO DEATH. I miss her so much. She is on a mission in Oklahoma and is about a year out now! Crazy time flies. ANYWAYS, I just love her. And here are a few more videos that I adore her in :D

all I'm saying, is I hope I'm as cute as she is when I'm 30.

and just this:

The Civil Wars CD of 2013

So, I've been waiting for this day for a long time. The day The Civil Wars would come out with a new CD. And let me just say I am more than impressed. I love their sound so much. Top favorite songs: Same Old Same Old, From this Valley, and Sacred Heart. Sacred Heart is in french and I looked up the translation in English and it is soooooo beautiful. Can't wait for Abby to get home so she can sing it to me in French :D here's the lyrics to these beautiful songs.

                                                              "Same Old Same Old"

I wanna leave you
I wanna lose us
I wanna give up
But I won’t

I wanna miss this
I want a heartache
I wanna run away
But I won’t

‘Cause do I love you
Oh, I do
And I’m going to ‘til I’m gone
But if you think that I can stay in this
same old, same old
Well, I don’t
I don’t

I’m gonna break things
I’m gonna cross the line
And make you wake up
‘cause you won’t

I’m gonna name names
I’m gonna call us out
I’m gonna say it
If you won’t

Do I love you
Oh, I do
And I’m going to ‘til I’m gone
But if you think that I can stay in this
Same old, same old
Well, I don’t

Oh I don’t wanna fight
But I’ll fight with you
If I have to, if I have to

‘Cause do I love you
Oh, I do
And I’m going to ‘til I’m gone
But if you think that I can stay in this
Same old, same old
Same old, same old
Well, I don’t
I don’t

"From This Valley"

Oh the desert dreams of a river
That will run down to the sea
Like my heart longs for an ocean
To wash down over me

Oh won't you take me from this valley
To that mountain high above
Oh I will pray, pray, pray till I see your smiling face
I will pray, pray, pray to the one that I love

Oh the outcast dreams of acceptance
Just to find pure love's embrace
Like an orphan longs for its mother
May you hold me in your grace

Oh won't you take me from this valley
To that mountain high above
Oh I will pray, pray, pray till I see your smiling face
I will pray, pray, pray to the one that I love

Ooh, whoa oh, whoa oh oh
Ooh, whoa oh, whoa oh oh

Oh the caged bird dreams of a strong wind
That will flow beneath her wings
Like a voice longs for a melody
Oh Jesus, carry me

Oh won't you take me from this valley
To that mountain high above
Oh I will pray, pray, pray till I see your smiling face
I will pray, pray, pray to the one that I love

Oh I will pray, pray, pray till I see your smiling face
I will pray, pray, pray to the one that I love

"Sacred Heart"

When I walk in the street

The street to the Sacred Heart

I remember the promises

In the name of love

I'll wait for you there

Will you come for me?

I'll wait for you there

only you

You can stand

Until the sun hides

And kiss me softly

Until he returns

I'll wait for you there

Will you come for me?

I'll wait for you there

only you

You may take the delay

You may have missed your train

You can not possibly forgive me

The shadows grow

And the crowds disappear

I'll wait for you there

Will you come for me?

I'll wait for you there

only you

Study Abroad, Art, Teaching, New Girl, Yes

So sometimes New Girl is my life and I love her. A lot of people pretty much know that I am tough and strong. But these are only the people that really know me, if not you may just think i'm an artist who loves Disney way too much for an adult who avoids confrontation maybe. But really sometimes its tough being an emotionally compromised woman in this world that expects you to man up! Anyways, in case you were wondering, yes I have toughed glitter int he last 24 hours and I also brake for birds but  like Zooey says, "that doesn't mean I'm not smart and tough and strong!" She preaches it like it is. I love being a girly woman who likes sparkly things and animals, and bows, and polka dots, and dessert and cute things! :D Takes me back to the days of apartment 92 getting frustrated about our majors or being a woman in general. Now let me just say that yes I am a feminist in the sense that woman should be taken more seriously in this world, but I am not one of the feminist who think the church is discriminating us... not at all. Frankly I think those are a bunch of really bored women who need someone to complain to about their unhappiness when they should really be focused on their own problems. I love being a gentle, girly, emotional, expressive, artistic, and lovely WOMAN! aww yeah.. thats all!

Jude Law and a Semester Abroad

So sorry I haven't posted in a while. So tired and crazy busy. I'll go back and add pictures when I'm done but for now let me just get it all written down while I still remember. Currently I am at the Heathrow Airport in England waiting for my flight at 10 am. And I've been here since 6 pm.. I finished filling up my Amazing journal Erin gave me for my birthday. I love it. I can't even close it its so full of tickets, post cards, pressed flowers and other junk. It's been crazy fun journaling.

Anyways, so we get to London and what do I do the first night there? See a show of course! After being in paris that morning, leaving at 6 am and taking the longest worst train ride ever to london, having to carry our suit cases up more flights of stairs that I knew I had the strength for. It was crazy.. so once we get in our hotel, some of us go to Leicester Square to see what shows were playing that night. We got really good deal on Singing in the Rain for that night so we bought them, did our assigned walking tour of London with my class, ran home and dressed up all fancy and went to a show! Longest day ever but it was 100 percent worth it. The audience in the first 10 rows got completely drenched from Don Lockwood's tap dancing and I sat on the balcony with Katie laughing at them with the binoculars I borrowed from Maddie. So great. More than worth it.

So we visited many of the famous art museums including British Museum, Tate Britain, Tate Modern, Wallace collection, Victoria and Albert museum, and of course the National Gallery. They were amazing. Sad to see some of the Ancient Greek stuff here in London though.. It belongs in Athens. GIVE IT BACK TO THEM! Anyways. So many amazing things to see. First of all I love my professor James. Not only was he super chill in London about time, museums, and journal assignments, but he made the museums extremely interesting and enjoyable. I love that he doesn't just tell us facts and random things we'll forget tomorrow. He gives us a reason why artworks are so important and has them relate to us now. Also he's hilarious. He laughed and congratulated me at the
British museum when he caught me fist bumping an extremely old Egyptian statue of a fist that I was
not suppose to be even touching. Also at the Tate Modern we came across a mobile sculpture and he had every one of us blow on it at the same time to see if we could get it to move. He's like a big little kid that I respect. A girl in our class named Angela even made a tally of every time he said the word "evocative" or started talking about a painting with "alright folks.." Haha so great.

Ok so I'm surprised I've gone this far without referencing a movie! Well first of all, this whole trip has felt like a movie. Can't believe it's over. Feels like Greece was a year ago. My professor James said at the beginning of the trip that every day will feel like an eternity but the end is coming like a train that can't be stopped! So true. That's how everything is. Working at Disney was the same! I cannot even believe that was two years ago. Feels like I was there just last summer.

Ok anyways. So I also got to see Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables. I bought phantom tickets for myself because that was the one I REALLY wanted to see. Besides les mis of course. So I bought my ticket that afternoon and Caroline dropped me off and took a picture of me wearing my masquerade mask from Venice. And my seat was pretty darn good for paying so little. Christine's voice was perfect. Everyone was perfect. Never been so satisfied with everyone's voice in a broadway besides when I saw wicked for the first time. And then Caroline picked me up like a good friend and roommate and we went home together, with the condition that I wear my mask all the way home! Haha fun times with that chica. Got several stares and a few giggles on the tube. And of course Les Mis was a dream! We got to upgrade our tickets the night of the show and we had pretty good seats before but after we upgraded we were literally in perfect seats. And then when Maddie went to upgrade hers she got her ticket later she she originally had a balcony seat, she got to upgrade to FRONT ROW! She could see the tears on Marius's face when he sang Empty Chairs! And the fog machines were all around her. So cool. She was so excited haha. That was really cool. And we all dressed up with our new Dorthy Perkins Dresses. We looked HOT for wearing the same clothes for 40 days.. Haha.

Last super cool thing I got to do was Harry Potter tour!!!! This was the thing I wanted to do most and I can't believe I almost didn't do it. First of all, I cried. Jaime Christensen, the girl who can count on one hand how many times I've cried, cried in the Harry Potter tour. Now I didn't cry in the whole thing. Just the part when they showed the castle in its entirety that they use for the zooming out scenes of Harry Potter. So it's not actually that big in real life. But it's pretty big! They have this beautiful room all lit up and blue walls to show the different lighting they use to get the time of day correct. I didn't see it coming. We were walking through the real set of diagonal ally and then I go through to the next section and there it was.. BAM. And I cried and walked around it again and again. And I watched it turn from day to night 3 or 4 times. It was truly magic. So besides me crying, we got to see some pretty amazing things in this museum. The first part you walk through the actual doors of the great hall, see Harry's first set of robes, the first Dumbledor's clothes, Dobby, the Griffindor common room, the wands of everyone, moving paintings, Harry's first snitch, the horcruxes, the ministry of magic, the night bus, revolving staircases, private drive, Godricks hollow, hogwarts bridge, night bus, flying car, and even the chess pieces. And so so so so so much more. Like an infinite amount of stuff more. Once Maddie loads her pics I will put them on here. My camera ran out of space so we used hers haha. It was amazing.

So everyone's flight left that Friday morning except mine which actually left Saturday morning so I had a wonderful day on my own on Friday. Being with 30 girls an one boy 24/7 was great but I sure missed my alone time. So I woke up Friday, said goodbye to people leaving for the airport, checked out of my hotel, paid for my bags to be left in hotel closet, and headed for the city of London on my own :)  my main goal of the whole day was to find Jude Law. There is actually a pretty good song by Brand New called "Jude Law and a Semester Abroad" that John showed me before I left. Haha it also is pretty convienent that Jude Law is my favorite male actor/celebrity crush. So when I met all my friends while on study abroad I told a few people that I plan to celebrity stalk him when I get to London. Then my friend Katie told me that when she lived in London with her family she lived right down the street to him. And he sill lives there. So what was I going to do on Friday by myself in London? Walk up and down Jude Laws street/neighborhood. It was awesome. Didn't ever see him. Didn't look like anyone was really home but yes I did see his house. And no I did not take a picture because I felt too much like a creep. But it is forever in my memory haha. The rest of the day bymyself I spent taking a nap in Hyde park, going shopping a little for my family, and eating frozen yogurt at this place called Snog. Which had a giant sign in the front window that said "snogging is 100 percent all natural." And  not only was this Snog good, it was the best Snog I ever had! Plain yogurt with raspberries. So yummy. 

Headed to the airport that night around 6 and spent the night there laying on my suitcases with my eye pillow. Hearing construction workers work on something in the airport all night. For abou 3 full hours of sleep. Then I checked in that morning, got on the plain from London to LA. 11 hour flight. And now I'm home and my adventure is over but boy did I learn a lot! Best thing I ever did! I'm so gla I did it while I am young and not married. I've been so blessed in my life and I have pretty much done everything I want to do before I'm married so I guess that's the next thing on my list. Gonna have to work on that haha. Well, back into the dating world of provo :/ I hope I post more in the future about my life! Bye!

Paris holds the key to protestors and too many decisions

PARIS! So the trip to Paris took about 13.5 hours...when it could have taken about 8.. Our bus driver insisted on going about 50 mph the entire way there. The only thing I have missed about America is how much faster we drive. BUT the drive was INSNANELY beautiful. And I know I keep saying the drive to each place is beautiful but it really is. It's so much prettier than I thought it would be. In Germany and France there ae just fields and fields of canola flowers that line the horizon as bright as the yellow brick road and the greenest green fields and trees that look like a fairytale Forrest and little villages that look like Bell's village or Snow White's cottage and everything is so cute and whimsical it's amazing. ANYWAYS we get to Paris pretty late with my friend Brynne and I singing "Paris Holds The Key to Your Heart" from Anastasia as loud as we can. Love that song. We started singing it when we first spot the Effie Tower. So we start our first day on Monday just doing a walk around tour of Norte-Dame and go to the Spanish quarters and get SUPER good falafels and go thrift store shopping where I got these gorgeous real leather Anastasia like ankle boots for only €15. They still smell like an old man but I put some dryer sheets inside them and hopefully that'll make them smell nicer. Anyways, Notre-Dame was gorgeous! Kept singing the "God Help The Outcasts" in my head while I was in there. Did not realize how magnificent it was in person. Sooooooooooooo pretty. I REALLY love French gothic architecture I've decided. So after we get home from the day we find out that only about 3 hours after we left Notre-Dame there was a man who shot himself at the alter inside Notre-Dame. Scary! They had to evacuate everyone in the square and it made pretty big news.

So while in Paris we've seen a bunch of museums and churches including the Louvre, D'orsay, Pompedu, Rodin, Saint Denis, Sant Chapelle, and a couple of other museums and churches I don't remember the names of. Got to sprint through the Louvre at 10 at night to see the Mona Lisa with no one around it before it closed. That was a funny sight to see. The guards were laughing and cheering
us on as we were running haha. Another day at the Louvre we watched a funny Asian lady running
through some of the galleries taking pictures of every single painting she saw.  I wish I could show you in writing the way she ran up to each painting and without even looking at the painting snapping a quick picture and then running to the next one crashing in to people and running in her bright yellow 3 inch high 90's sneakers. I heard once that if you spend 30 seconds at each painting it would take you over 2 weeks to see everything in the Louvre. We only get 3 days but maybe this lady was trying to set some sort of record haha.

Anyways. Besides the museums and churches our free time is up to us on what to do.. So far I think I have just picked the wrong groups to do things with. Still haven't been to the Eiffel Tower, still haven't seen the Arch of Triumph, still haven't seen moulin rouge or the opera house, and I lost my chance today of going to Monet's garden becaus everyone that wanted to go flaked on me last minute. I was pretty sad today actually because I was looking at some of my old journals before I left and I wrote down a LONG time ago that said on my bucket list I wanted to see them so I told everyone that I was gonna go and I was gonna do whatever it took to get there. After getting to Paris and realizing
how difficult it was to travel there I realized that it would be very dumb to go alone especially with
what happened in Notre-Dame and how bad I am at directions and stuff so I knew others were planning on going Sunday so left my trust into doing it then. Sunday comes and after church and a museum and after asking everyone like 10 times if they were for sure going everyone bailed and said they were too tired. My heart sank as I realized I wouldn't be able to go. One of the girls even talked about just going the next time she went to Paris. Sorry, but I don't know the next time I will be going to Paris and I don't mind that nobody wanted to go but I'm just mad that I was so close to going and everyone flaked last minute. If there's one thing I try never to be its a flake. When I say I'm going to something I go or I try my hardest to make it there. Some of us may never get a chance like this ever again and I am very sad that I haven't been able to do anything I want to do really yet because people have changed their minds last minute or been too tired to do things. I'm probably being overdramatic right now but I am just upset. We really only have 3 full days left in Paris and 2 of those days are day trips to Versailles and Chartres so I pretty much have one day to do all the things I want to do. I may
just end up going myself on Tuesday. I'm tired of waiting for other people. The worse thing is is that
idk if I can go out anymore on my own though because today there was the biggest protest that Paris
has ever had in history (including the revolution) revolting against the passing of gay marriage in France. This also had to do with the man who commit suicide at Notre-Dame. Apparently he commit suicide to make a statement and so over 2 million peopled gathered near the Eiffel tower with family signs and no gay marriage signs so that he didn't "die in vain" but honestly him killing himself is breaking up his family so I feel like it was a little contradictory that they think gay marriage is breaking the family but killing yourself is ok, because he's a martyr or something. Anyways. Some girls in my group got stuck in the riots and were stuck there for a good few hours before some professor from a university here who knew English helped them get out. Glad they are safe. But now we're not sure if things around Paris will get worse. Some of the trains and metros were blocked off and closed too because of it too so that's also a different problem for us.

The one thing I did get to do though was of course the magical DISNEYLAND PARIS! After a day at the Louvre our professors told us that since we had some extra money we saved from the hotel because we squished 3 in a room instead of 2 we each got an extra €100 to spend on whatever! I really wanted to do Disney but I wasn't sure if I wanted to save for fun stuff like broadway in London or the Harry potter museum or other things but with the extra hundred me and some great girls got to go on Friday. It was amazing the day of the 20th anniversary so we got a discount on our tickets and because it was pouring rain we walked on every ride. It was amazing. Best day I've had in Paris. Hope I can do the real things I'm suppose to do in Paris before I leave. I of course have more to say about Disneyland Paris but I am tired and need to go to bed. So that's all for tonight. Only less that 2 weeks left! Don't wanna come home but at the same time I am exhausted. Bittersweet.